REAL MEN DON’T GROPE

December 27, 2016. I spent Christmas with my own tiny family that consists of my wife and her daughter. The three of us were also invited to visit most of the day with the lovely family of some of my daughter’s friends. A large and active group, the friends’ family consists mostly of well-educated and politically liberal females. The one male, the Father of two teen aged daughters, comes from a family of Jews, but has acclimated cheerfully to Christmas traditions with his wife’s people. He and I promised that we would light a menorah and sing a Hannukah song next year if we find ourselves together again at Christmas. For me Christmas is the reminder of the joy of birth and new infants, the core of the Christmas story. There was an awareness among all of us that women are wonderful. Christmas can remind us all of the most wonderful special thing that only women can do.

I reflected again this year that for me Christmas has become the most emphatic and enduring reminder that a newborn baby was and is sacred. The poorest Mother delivering the poorest infant is preserving our species through an act of creation that requires truly unimaginable and unfathomable power. Conception is a joint human venture that is the necessary predicate of a train of events that nature orchestrates unseen within the body of a human who has virtually no control of any of it after the initial act. The infant that eventually emerges at birth is the hope of the continuation of the love that started the process. If there was genuine respect and affection between the conceiving couple, the future of the infant, and therefore the species, is also hopeful. Sex can happen simply because two people enjoy the stimulation that the presence of one gives to the other. But the old moralists of every culture have not been wrong to treat conception as one of the pillars of civil order, both public and private. Eventually all adolescents are taught by their culture that these essential facts matter, that maturation does not just mean the acquisition of the biological ability to participate is sexual activity.

We are all tasked to keep our sexual activity as not mere fun, but as the extremely serious expression of the most cherished of human emotions and activity—loving intimacy. We are admonished that adulthood includes responsibility for respect for the right of every person to engage in that activity only voluntarily and only with another who shares the same respect. Manhood and womanhood are not the fantasies of entertainment and sport; they are the sexual expressions of adulthood. Many cultures reserve the status of adulthood for those who have achieved a committed sexual union. Men and women in this culture have been taught that. Both liberals and conservatives understand the seriousness of sexual consent that comes from deep affection and commitment.

So visiting this beautiful and loving family this year and sharing the nativity season with my wife and daughter all were wonderful. Somewhere in the wonder my musings reminded me again that the nation’s choice of a leader last month was more and worse than a political mistake. It was a betrayal of some of our most cherished cultural values. Truly, whether you are Democrat or Republican, conservative or liberal, man or woman, you must agree: REAL MEN DON’T GROPE.


 

Comments are encouraged, though your first one on this blog must be approved by blog author before it appears. Thanks!